Tomorrow is my last day of work at the newspaper. I am throwing myself a small "retirement" party at a local bar/restaurant and invited anyone in the company who wanted to come by and send me off.

I've been getting lots of encouraging words and emails all this week, wishing me luck and asking me how I've been feeling.

Full disclosure: I'm terrified. And I'm really excited.

As a fairly even keeled person who is able to sleep most nights, it's been odd to be a bundle of nerves, tossing and turning in bed for the last week. Here are some sample thoughts:

Will I have enough clients? Will they like my work? How will Sadie adjust to me being home a lot more? Is there more I could be doing to make things easier next week? Do I know enough to do this? Is ten paces from my desk (work area) to my bed (nonwork area) far enough?

Ok you get the idea.

So I've been waking up and writing things down. One night it was a list of clients. The other it was a paragraph about the things I thought were going really well in my life. Another night it was a preoccupation remembering people's birthdays. (OK that's a weird one but I think when your brain runs out of problems, it creates new ones.)

In general I'm feeling good but nervous that the time has finally come when things are finishing while new things are beginning. And I'm having a hard time thinking (and writing really) about anything else.

As of 5:01 pm tomorrow, I will be self employed. And that is pretty cool… 

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